Twila Doucet Caregiver Coordinator LTCA of Enid Area Agency on AgingI have heard it said that more family caregivers die before the person they care for than the other way around. I personally know two caregivers who have died in the last year, before the person they were caring for. Is it just because they are caregivers? I say no. It’s not being a caregiver that causes the problems, it is how you deal with stress and the changes that being a caregiver brings to your life. Some caregivers still try to work while they care for their loved one. Some caregivers have to quit their job in order to care for their loved one. Becoming a caregiver changes your life as you knew it before. Caregivers are usually so immersed in their role that they neglect their own care. The stress is not only related to the daunting work of caregiving, but also the grief associated with the decline in the health of their loved one. The majority of caregivers go through a period of shock followed by major adjustments in their roles.So how can you as a caregiver deal with the stress and changes to your life in a better way so not to affect your own health? Don’t try to do it alone. You need to allow others to help you whether it is another family member or a friend. If neither of those is an option you can turn to home health agencies, adult day care, or hire individuals to come in and help you so you can have a break. Caregivers feel guilty if they focus on themselves but by focusing on yourself you become more able to give your loved one the care they need. Much of the time when friends ask if they can do anything to help we say “no, I’m ok.” Don’t do that. If someone offers, have them cook a meal or come over and sit with your loved one for an hour or two so you can have a break to go shopping, to your own doctor appointments, or just do something that you find relaxing. If no one offers, ask your friends or family if they could come sit with your loved one for an hour or two. If you don’t have any family or friends to help look into what is available in your community, such as,
